Trick or Treats (1982)

September 4, 2018

Directed by: Gary Graver

Written by: Gary Graver

Starring: Jacqueline Giroux, Peter Jason, Chris Graver

Budget: $55,000

Tagline: ...when Halloween night stopped being fun!

Trivia: The bulk of this film was shot at the home owned by cast member Carrie Snodgress.






This movie left me pissed off at both the movie and myself for wasting 90 minutes of my life on it. Here's the plot: Some kid does all kinds of Home Alone pranks on a babysitter for 80 minutes while a man in drag races across town to murder him. The guy in a dress gets to the house and is killed by the kid. That's it. It is a tedious test of patience as you watch prank after prank after prank wondering when the hell is this bit going to end? Crap... now I'm getting pissed off at myself for spending another five minutes to write this review... I'm going to go have a beer and watch Texas Chainsaw to cleanse my horror palate.

The Conjuring (2013)

September 3, 2018

Directed by: James Wan

Written by: Chad Hayes, Carey W. Hayes

Starring: Patrick Wilson, Vera Farmiga, Ron Livingston

Budget: $20,000,000

Quote: "The devil exists. God exists. And for us, as people, our very destiny hinges upon which one we elect to follow."

Trivia: When the movie was shown in the Philippines, some cinemas had to hire Catholic priests to bless the viewers before showing it. This was due to some viewers having reported a "Negative Presence" after watching the film. The priests also provided spiritual and psychological help to the viewers.


Man, I really missed out on horror movies over the past decade prior to a few months ago. As a kid and teenager I used to search through the aisles of Blockbuster Video watching nearly ever movie I could get my hands on. Then in my twenties I was part of a horror movie club that my friend started where a bunch of us friends would get together to drink beer and watch horror movies. But then I moved away for a bit and didn't keep up with the new movies. So I had never seen any of the Conjuring movies, but figured I should  probably give it a shot since the spinoff The Nun is coming out this Friday. Enough of my backstory...

The Conjuring is a film that explores the existence of paranormal activity. It is based on the true story from the case files Ed and Lorraine Warren which are more or less a true life ghostbuster married couple. The movie has a handful of cheap jump scares but what really makes the film effective is what we do not get to see in the film. The parts where the demons or ghosts are not visible and the moments when something is amiss but what is wrong is not yet apparent. When we finally first see the demon, it is rather disappointing because the viewer's imagination is what makes the demon and story so scary. But this is not to say that everything is left up to the viewer's imagination. Hitchcock and Polanski were masters using atmosphere to create suspense, but those were different times. Today's horror audience demands at least some visual satisfaction in the form of monsters and gore and this movie offers that as well.

A Nightmare on Elm Street 2: Freddy's Revenge (1985)

September 2, 2018

Directed by: Jack Sholder

Written by: David Chaskin

Starring: Robert Englund, Mark Patton, Kim Myers

Budget: $3,000,000

Tagline: Someone is coming back to Elm Street

Trivia: This film is famous for having undertones and themes that many perceive as homoerotic, and the events of the film are often seen as an allegory for Jesse's closeted homosexuality. While the makers of the film initially denied that this subtext was intentional, Screenwriter David Chaskin eventually admitted that the subtext was intentionally written into the script, in order to give the characters more depth.

A Nightmare on Elm Street 2, the often overlooked Freddy film. What makes it so overlooked is that it is missing the gifted directing and writing of Wes Craven that the first film had and it also lacks the silly and fun goofiness of the later Nightmare films. It is neither scary nor funny. Instead what we're left with is a watered down version of the first movie that is completely forgettable. I really hate to agree with People magazine of all things, but it really is a "tedious, humorless mess."

The House of the Devil (2009)

September 1, 2018

Directed by: Ti West

Written by: Ti West

Starring: Jocelin Donahue,  Tom Noonan, Mary Woronov

Budget: $900,000

Quote: "During the 1980s over 70% of American adults believed in the existence of abusive Satanic Cults... Another 30% rationalized the lack of evidence due to government cover ups... The following is based on true unexplained events..."

Trivia: Deliberately shot in the same kind of style and using similar techniques as the splatter films of the 70s and the 80s which it emulates.



The House of the Devil is a beautifully shot film that was carefully crafted to make it look like it came from the early 1980s. Filmed on 16mm film and set in 1983, the film really does look and feel like an eighties slasher film. While watching it, I had to double check on IMDB to make sure that it was in fact from 2009 and not 1979. The soundtrack also features an eighties classic by The Fixx played through a cassette walkman. Those of us in our thirties and older will recognize it. Finally, the film also borrows film techniques popular in the eighties slashers such as a zoom in on characters, the opening credits in yellow font, and a freeze frame at the end with a still image of the closing credits. While the movie itself is an occult film and not a slasher, it has the feel of the eighties slashers.

The Loved Ones (2009)

August 31, 2018

Directed by: Sean Byrne

Written by: Sean Byrne

Starring: Xavier Samuel, Robin McLeavy, Victoria Thaine

Budget: $4,000,000

Quote: "I'm gonna go to your house now and stab your mummy just like you did my Daddy. Then I'm gonna go find Holly and stab her in the heart just like you did to me."

Trivia: Under the instructions of director Sean Byrne, Robin McLeavy prepared for the role of Lola by researching the serial killer Jeffrey Dahmer, as well as watching Misery (1990), Natural Born Killers (1994) and the works of Quentin Tarantino.



The successes of the Saw movies and Hostel has given a rebirth to a genre of film making that has largely been ignored since the 1970s grind house exploitation films, the torture film. It's understandable why the genre has been largely ignored. The movies are so unpleasant to watch. And for the most part, the pejorative "torture porn" is an apt title since most of these movies are nothing more than excessive gore without story structure. The Loved Ones is certainly a torture film, but what makes it such a great film is that it has a rich story, well developed characters, and interesting twists. Plus it has one of the greatest villains in horror movie history: Lola "princess." While the torture is really unpleasant to watch, the film also has some great comedic moments that help to lighten up the film and an assortment of interesting characters whose lives all intersect around the madness of Lola.

Hatchet (2006)

August 30, 2018

Directed by: Adam Green

Written by: Adam Green

Starring: Kane Hodder, Joel David Moore, Deon Richmond

Budget: $1,500,000

Quote: "But you only shot him once, right? Maybe you gotta shoot him more times. Like four- or six- maybe you gotta shoot him six times?"

Trivia: If you watch all three "Hatchet" movies in a row without opening and end credits, it would be one uninterupted storyline, revolving around a few days




During the 1980s, the American slasher movie was king. Starting with Halloween and following shortly by Friday the 13th, there were dozens of movie franchises (most that went on way longer than they should have) cranking out movies where masked psychos killed teenagers. Then in the mid-1990s the genre began go quiet, aside from the Scream films (that time when there was only one set of footprints in the sand, that is when Wes Craven carried us). The 2000s gave us remakes and reboots of our beloved killers, Jason came back to life and My Bloody Valentine  got a 3D reboot. But where was the new slasher? Finally, in 2006 Hatchet was released. Hatchet is these filmmakers attempt to breathe life back into this truly American genre. Kane Hodder, who played Jason in a couple of the Friday the 13th movies, plays Victor Crowley a new and terrifying face in the Slasher genre. Packed with hokey comedy and a couple of cameos from horror legends (Robert Englund and Tony Todd make appearances, also John Carl Beuchler who made Ghoulies 3 makes an appearance as a piss drinking hillbilly) this is a perfect movie to watch with a few beers and friends.

All Cheerleaders Die (2013)

August 29, 2018

Directed by: Lucky McKee, Chris Sivertson

Written by: Lucky McKee, Chris Sivertson

Starring: Sidney Allison, Charon Arnold, Shay Astar

Quote: Somebody got fucked. Somebody got killed. I'm going to gym.

Trivia: Lucky McKee remade this film after finding his first film of the same name went straight to video and was very hard to find.







Alright, I think this'll be a quick one. I am usually a sucker for a cheerleader slasher movie but this one did not deliver. The movie pretty quickly goes in unexpected ways, which is pretty cool, but ultimately this just ends up being a disappointment. Instead of a slasher we have ourselves a witch film. There are elements of The Craft in the film, but this one falls flat. The movie is well shot, the special effects are decent, but the storyline does not grab the attention. Its biggest flaw is that none of the characters are very likable or interesting so I found it really hard to care about what happens to any of them.