The Loved Ones (2009)

August 31, 2018

Directed by: Sean Byrne

Written by: Sean Byrne

Starring: Xavier Samuel, Robin McLeavy, Victoria Thaine

Budget: $4,000,000

Quote: "I'm gonna go to your house now and stab your mummy just like you did my Daddy. Then I'm gonna go find Holly and stab her in the heart just like you did to me."

Trivia: Under the instructions of director Sean ByrneRobin McLeavy prepared for the role of Lola by researching the serial killer Jeffrey Dahmer, as well as watching Misery (1990), Natural Born Killers (1994) and the works of Quentin Tarantino.



The successes of the Saw movies and Hostel has given a rebirth to a genre of film making that has largely been ignored since the 1970s grind house exploitation films, the torture film. It's understandable why the genre has been largely ignored. The movies are so unpleasant to watch. And for the most part, the pejorative "torture porn" is an apt title since most of these movies are nothing more than excessive gore without story structure. The Loved Ones is certainly a torture film, but what makes it such a great film is that it has a rich story, well developed characters, and interesting twists. Plus it has one of the greatest villains in horror movie history: Lola "princess." While the torture is really unpleasant to watch, the film also has some great comedic moments that help to lighten up the film and an assortment of interesting characters whose lives all intersect around the madness of Lola.

After being rejected to the dance by Brent (who understandably wants to go with his girlfriend), Lola decides to get her revenge by having her father drug and kidnap Brent so the two can torture him during their own "End of the Year Dance" at their house. Brent, himself is dealing with depression after he accidentally killed his father in a driving accident after he swerved to miss a pedestrian in the middle of the street. Brent has taken to smoking pot and cutting himself with a razor blade he hides on a necklace. Meanwhile, his girlfriend and mom and desperately trying to find him while his best friend Jamie spends most of the time the dance is on getting high and drunk with local the local emo girl Mia in his car. Mia's dad is also the cop trying to find Brent. I'm introducing all these characters because all their lives will intersect at the end of the film.

Now for Lola's party. Lola and her father do just about everything you could think of to Brent as revenge for rejecting Lola. They insect cleaning fluid into his neck with a syringe. They hammer knives through his feet into the floor to keep him in one place. Lola uses a fork to carve a heart with LS into his chest. Afterwards she tosses salt on it. During a really disgusting scene, Lola and her father drill a hole into Brent's forehead so they can pour a boiling liquid into it turning him into their own zombie. Brent is forced to urinate into a jar otherwise the father will nail his dick to a chair.

Lola seems to be a girl that has never not gotten what she wanted. This becomes clearer when she brings out her scrap book with pictures of earlier victims that began when she was around five. She is the product of what happens when a psychopathic child is never denied anything by her father. She is quick to anger and delights in the suffering of others. There is also a lady that is hanging around who has already been zombified that they call Bright Eyes. Although they never come right out and say it, it is assumed that Bright Eyes was Lola's mother. Oh, and there is a dungeon with half a dozen zombified teenagers. If all this wasn't bad enough, there are some really repulsive incestual scenes. During an earlier scene while Lola is changing into her dress, the family seems uncomfortably aroused. Later, Lola admits that the reason she hasn't found the right boy is because her father is her prince charming and are about to kiss when Brent gets loose.

There is also a lot of disappointment that the film capitalizes on that makes it a frustrating and fun watch. There are so many times where Brent almost escapes and our hopes are high only to have them dashed when he is recaptured or fails. At point he even escapes the house only to be chased up a tree and then fall unconscious when Lola beans him with a rock in the head. At another point a cop comes to rescue him, only to be killed and thrown in the dungeon by Lola. There are so many close calls that are meant to play with the viewer's emotions.




The ending of the movie is what separates it from "torture porn" movies like Hostel. We are, of course given our revenge but also the disparate characters all finally come together. Brent flashbacks to the car crash and realizes that the pedestrian in the middle of the road was one of Lola's victims that escaped so she is somewhat responsible for his father's death. Later we discover that the escaped victim was Mia's brother and his loss is the reason for her dangerous behavior: drinking, drugs, sex, and wearing all black. Also, this has even more meaning since her father is the cop who will eventually make his way to Lola's house after Brent's girlfriend remembers Brent telling her about how Lola asked him to the dance. The revenge is pretty sweet. I won't get into the details of it, in case you haven't seen it. It is well worth the wait.

Brent's best friend is a stumbling metal head who smokes a lot of pot. His storyline with Mia add the necessary lightness the film needs. Without their story the movie would be way to dark and nearly unwatchable. Headbanging in the car, over the pants HJs at the dance, and getting caught having sex in the parking lot add a bit of humor. Also, Lola and her father's psychopathy is not without a bit of amusement. Lola is just such a weird girl that during the parts where she is not actively torturing Brent, she is kind of funny. The dance that her father created for her is almost funny if it was not so disgusting.

The Loved Ones is an absolute must see horror flick coming for Australia. Gory, disgusting, and a lot of fun. Lola is one of the best horror characters to come out in a long time.


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